Protecting your child from cyber-bullying requires vigilance on the part of parents and caregivers, but kids can help their friends too. Here are some prevention strategies everyone can use — including time-tested anti-bullying methods and recommendations for helpful technologies
- What Parents and Caregivers Can do
- Even if you don’t think your child is being bullied online, talking to them about the subject is a great first steps:
- Discuss what cyber-bullying is.
- Ask if they know anyone who is being or has been cyber-bullied.
- Discuss what your child should do if they notice someone being bullied online.
- Encourage your child to tell you or someone else they trust if they receive a threatening message.
- Reassure them that they won’t be in trouble for this and won’t have their cell phone or computer confiscated.
- React to Cyber-bullying in the Right Way
- Finding out that your child has been bullied is incredibly difficult. However, the way you react to this knowledge is incredibly important.
- Don’t overreact. Don’t berate them for not telling you sooner.
- Be understanding and supportive. Work together to resolve the situation and reinforce the idea that you and your child are a team.
- Emphasize that your child isn’t to blame if they’ve been bullied.
- Don’t under react. Don’t tell your child to “just deal with it.” Take what they say seriously.
- Never tease them about being bullied and don’t dismiss their experiences.
- Document Cyber-bullying Incidents
- If your child is being cyber-bullied, it’s important to document and report every incident. In addition to taking the steps above, you should:
- Save threats and document them, including threatening texts, sexually explicit pictures, or harassing messages
- Report incidents of cyber-bullying to the website used, the cell phone company, and the ISP involved.
- Block the bully’s mobile number or email address on your child’s devices. Consider blocking the website that’s being used to commit the cyber-bullying.
- Contact the school or parents of the bully, if you can identify them. However, always check with your child first to gauge their comfort level by contacting the parties involved.
- Monitor Your Child’s Technology Use
- One of a parent’s most effective tools for preventing cyber-bullying is to monitor their usage of mobile phones and computers. Your kid won’t necessarily like it, but you can explain to them that having a powerful adult ally can make sure they’re protected from bullies
- Restrict mobile device and computer usage to a common area of the house that everyone can access.
- Put data limits on your child’s mobile phone.
- Turn off text messages during certain hours if your mobile provider offers the option.
- Make use of the filtering options on your child’s internet browsers on their computer and phone.
- Turn on parental controls for:
- Gaming networks like Xbox Live and PlayStation Network.
- Other computer games like MMOs or mobile games. (Note that kids may use multiple browsers on laptops or computers to get around filters.)
- Your child’s social media sites like Facebook, Twitter, Snapchat, Youtube, and Instagram.
- Both Android devices and iPhones allow parents to set controls on apps.
- You can also find third-party apps that control what kids can do with their mobile devices.
- Insist that your child divulge all their passwords. Using a password sharing tool like Last Pass can help.
- Keep abreast of text messaging acronyms. This may just be a question of asking your children.
- Check contacts listed on your kid’s social networks and ask them to explain who each of them is.
- Use Celebrities as Inspiration
- Children are heavily influenced by celebrities, even more so than previous generations, in part due to their relatively easy access via social media. Fandoms — like comic book heroes or pop groups — can also be a way to positively inspire kids.
- Check out your child’s idols. Many singers, professional athletes, and actors support initiatives to stop cyber-bullying. Some celebrities (like Taylor Swift and many others) have experienced cyber-bullying themselves and can provide excellent proof against the idea that bullying is somehow cool.
- Build a Positive Environment
- Cyber-bullying victims often feel demoralized, alone, and afraid. It’s crucial that parents and caregivers help kids restore their self-respect and regain a positive perspective.
- Each child is different in how they want to respond to difficult situations. Some kids may want to stand up to the bully while others may not. Regardless of how your child reacts, it’s important to support them as they heal so you can reach a positive outcome.
- School staff can do a lot to help prevent cyber-bullying. Teachers can work with parents via meetings, the school’s website and forums, or newsletters to encourage parents to discuss cyber-bullying.
- Understand the Laws on Cyber-bullying
- Depending on the type of cyber-bullying taking place, the actions may breach stalking, sexual harassment, and anti-discrimination laws or violates school codes. In many cases, cyber-bullying violates the terms of service for many social sites.
- Here are a few things to keep in mind:
- In the US, cyber-bullying can result in a charge of juvenile delinquency or a misdemeanor cyber-harassment charge.
- Identity theft, password theft, or hacking can violate state and federal laws.
- In some states, “sexting” or even forwarding on a “sext” (text messages of a sexual nature) is punishable as possessing or distributing child pornography. If convicted, a sexter may be required to register as a sex offender, even if they’re a minor.
- If an adult perpetrates or allows cyber-bullying, they can be arrested for cyber-harassment or cyber-stalking, which can result in a felony or misdemeanor punishment.
- In the UK, online harassment and cyber-bullying can violate various laws like the Defamation Act 2013, Communications Act 2003, Protection from Harassment Act 1997, and others.
- What Kids and Teens Can Do to Fight Back Against Cyber-bullying
- Although kids may not be aware of it, their own behavior can have an impact on their peers. To create a unified message against cyber-bullying, enlist the help of other students as well as teachers and parents by creating an anti-bullying mindset at your school.
- For example, you can encourage kids to speak up about cyber-bullying through a reporting system that’s monitored by the school and parents. You can also request that your school promote suicide hotlines.
- Prevent Cyber-bullying before it starts
- It’s not possible to predict or prevent every form that cyber-bullying can take, but your kids can follow some general guidelines that help prevent it.
- Don’t forward any type of bullying messages or images.
- Use peer pressure to ensure your friends consider cyber-bullying off-limits.
- Don’t share personal information of any kind — including addresses and phone numbers.
- Never share your passwords with anyone except your parents.
- Talk to your parents or another trusted adult if you aren’t sure about someone’s behavior toward you.
- Never post or text anything that you wouldn’t feel comfortable sharing with all your classmates.
- Don’t post angry!
- Treat people the way you’d want to be treated yourself.
- Reading books
- It is a proven fact that reading can help reduce stress. Reading can be a wonderful (and healthy) escape from the stress of everyday life. Simply by opening a book, you allow yourself to be invited into a literary world that distracts you from your daily stressors. Reading can even relax your body by lowering your heart rate and easing the tension in your muscles. It works better and faster than other relaxation methods, such as listening to music or drinking a hot cup of tea. This is because your mind is invited into a literary world that is free from the stressors that plague your daily life. Set aside 30 minutes to read every day in a quiet place where you won't be interrupted.
- SITES
- http://www.aama.ca/docs/cyberbulling.pdf
- http://www.bewebaware.ca/english/cyberbullying.html
- http://www.billyonline.org/workbully/bystand.html
- http://bullying.suite101.com/article.cfm/it_is_against_the_law
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