Signs and symptoms of cyberbullying

Some of the warning signs of cyber-bullying may overlap with those of traditional bullying. However, here are a few things you should look in particular:

• Anxiety or Anger: Pay attention to your teenager’s mood both during and after they use a mobile phone or computer. Do they consistently seem anxious, nervous, or otherwise upset when spending time online? Do they get angry or have outbursts when they are online?

• Secretive: Has your teen become secretive or defensive about their online activities? If they unexpectedly shut off devices when others approach, refuse to discuss what they do online, or get upset or agitated when you try to discuss this with them, they may be attempting to hide the fact that they are being bullied.

• Avoiding Technology: Take note of the frequency of the amount of time your teen spends online, especially if they have always enjoyed it. If they have suddenly stopped using their devices as frequently (or possibly altogether), they may be attempting to avoid a bully.

• Becoming Withdrawn: Even if your teenager has always been quiet or introverted, observe their social behavior. Do they want to spend more and more time away from their friends and peers? Have they suddenly started commenting on their lack of friends or how there’s drama at school? Have they been pushing away people they’re close to and wanting to spend more time alone?

• Increase in Messages: Has your teen started to receive a lot more messages or emails than they usually do? Are they from numbers or people you don’t recognize? Is your teenager evasive when you ask them who is contacting them?

• Depression: Has your teen’s mood changed? Do they often seem sad or depressed? Has there been a drastic change to their eating or sleeping patterns? Are they claiming to be sick more often to avoid going to school or social events? Have they lost interest in other activities or hobbies?

Signs Your Teen Might Be a Cyber-bully

Also be on the lookout for warning signs that your teen might be bullying their peers. It may be unexpected or shocking, but cyber-bullying is becoming more and more common. Not only the “bad kids” are bullies, and it doesn’t mean you’ve failed as a parent.

It’s incredibly important to look for warning signs that your teenager may be a bully. Not only are they deliberately trying to hurt others, but it may also be their own way of seeking attention or help. Some of the signs to look for include:

• Many Accounts: Does your teen have a large number of social media accounts on various websites? Are they under names other than your teens? Do you recognize the name listed on the account? They may be attempting to anonymously harass someone or infiltrate others’ accounts.

• Secretive: Is your teenager secretive about what they do online? Do they turn off or hide their screen when others approach them while they’re online? Are they evasive or hostile when you ask them questions about their online activities? Do they get irritated or annoyed if you interrupt them while they’re using a phone or computer?

• Long Hours Online: Pay attention to the amount of time your teen spends online. Is it excessive, especially compared to how much they’ve spent on the internet in the past? Are they obsessive about spending time on their devices or checking their messages? Do they prefer to spend time online at times of the day when they are less likely to be supervised, like before you get home from work or in the middle of the night?

• Lack of Remorse: Does your teenager seem to not care if their words or actions hurt others? Do they make snarky or rude comments, especially when using their phone or computer? Is this callousness new or previously out-of-character for your teen?

• New Friend Group: Has your teen recently made new friends who seem to be mean or aggressive? Do these friends have a history of bullying others themselves? Has your teenager become preoccupied with impressing them or becoming more popular with them? Peer pressure from new friends who seem aggressive can motivate many teen to start cyber-bullying others.

• Becoming Withdrawn: Has your teen abandoned activities and hobbies in favor of spending more time online? Do they no longer want to spend time with close friends or family members, preferring to spend time alone with their devices? Do they appear to be depressed?

Why Teenagers Cyber-bully others

The reasons why one teen chooses to bully another are complex and varied. They may want to feel powerful, feel the need to act out for attention, or feel like they must control others. While each person’s motives are different, similar factors may come into play when teenagers choose to cyber-bully.

• Boredom: Some teens may simply be bored and or craving attention. It’s a way to add excitement or drama to their lives with very little effort. Cyber-bullying often will become a new form of online entertainment.

• Peer Pressure: Some bullies may be trying to impress their peers, become more popular, or maintain their social status. Being part of a group can give people a false sense of security that their actions are acceptable or normal.

• Revenge: Teens may choose to cyber-bully someone because they feel wronged by that person or that their victim deserves it. The bully may feel that their behavior is justified due to the pain the victim previously inflicted upon them.

• Anonymity: Cyber-bullies can embrace the chance to be anonymous by doing all of their harassment online under an identity other than their own. They may feel like they won’t get caught and don’t have to face their victim directly.

• Ignorance: Some cyber-bullies may simply not realize that what they’re doing is, in fact, bullying. They may think it’s just a joke and not take the situation seriously

The Potential Effects of Cyber-bullying

Traditional bullying is known to have adverse effects on victims. Academic performance can suffer, anxiety and depression can develop — and these issues can continue into adulthood. And much like traditional bullying, cyber-bullying can have severe, negative consequences for the victim.

Victims may experience the following effects after being cyber-bullied:

• Decreased Self-Esteem: Bullying of all kinds is often detrimental to the victim’s self-esteem. Victims may believe that all of their peers dislike them and develop issues with trust and confidence.

• Emotional Distress: Cyber-bullying can lead to a shift in mood or emotion in the victim. The constant stress of the attacks can make victims prone to outbursts of frustration, sadness, or anger as they try to cope with the bullying.

• Physical Symptoms: Victims may begin to develop frequent headaches, stomach aches, and have trouble sleeping. Though they are not attacked physically by the bully, the ongoing stress of the harassment may still take a physical toll as the victim grows increasingly stressed and anxious.

• Depression:Cyber-bullying can cause victims to develop depression. The constant stress and lowered self-esteem can cause them to feel hopeless, unloved, and sadness.

• Suicidal Thoughts:About 20 percent of cyber-bullying victims seriously consider suicide. Bullying does not directly cause victims to commit suicide, but it does put them at a higher risk of doing so.

As with traditional bullying, these issues may persist even after the victim is no longer suffering from cyber-bullying, and may continue well into adulthood.